a wonderful view of the mountains on Clingman’s Dome
Hi all, it’s been a while since my last post. I have had a lot things that have happened in the past month and half. Some were exciting and some were sad. I realized I have posted something about mental health a while back and especially when it comes to self care and I feel like that is what I’ve been trying to do — but it might not be.
So, I’m going to start off on the sad news so we can end in a happier note. A month ago, I found out that I was pregnant. And then about a week ago, I found out that I had lost the pregnancy. When I was pregnant I had a hard time concentrating because I was just so excited and now that I’ve lost the pregnancy I’m distracted because I’m trying to get my emotions in check.
On a happier note, my husband and I are about a couple weeks out from closing on a house! I’m so excited to finally be homeowners and decorate my house the way I want to or paint the walls the colors I want. I can’t wait to put HOLES in the wall so I can hang things! (That’s a huge deal for me) I’m also going to have a space for my office and I’ll have room to get that sectional I’ve always wanted.
All materialistic things I know, but it really is something I’ve been wanting since we graduated college.
I wasn’t sure why I couldn’t get anything done when for the entire month that I was happy. I felt like with these emotions, I should be motivated to finish something and start something, but it was the exact opposite. I’m not really sure why the that extreme caused issues for me. I literally had no motivation to put words down except if it was for work. I know why it’s hard to do anything now because I’m sad. I don’t want to say depressed, but it almost feels like it. I feel like this will somehow tie into a story in the future.
I’m trying to figure it out now as I work on getting myself back into the writing and motivation stage. I’m trying to get better at posting blog posts and actually make it informative. I haven’t even sent out my newsletter for the month because last month I didn’t do anything and I’m embarrassed about it.
I do have things slowly going on. My novella has finished its edit and I’m really close to publishing my anthology. I’m just making sure I have the capital to do it all and I won’t be reaching into my savings too much. I feel like my mind is self-sabotaging this entire ordeal and that is why it’s taking me awhile to complete the steps.
I hope that I’ll have better posts heading your way in the near future. I am starting to plan out what I want to write about in the coming weeks. I promise I will not let this blog die out like I have with my past ones.
Please be patient with me as I try to rework and organize my writing and life balance.
Thanks so much for sticking around and reading!
-Emi